Noah’s Ark on PBS…

In 1948, a British pilot serving in Iraq acquired a clay tablet with an intriguing, 3,700 year-old inscription. The ancient writing tells the story of how the god Enki warns a Sumerian king named Atra-Hasis of a future flood that will destroy mankind; Enki gives him instructions for building a boat to save his family and livestock. If that sounds like a familiar tale, it’s because this was one of several ancient flood traditions that, centuries later, would inspire the biblical story of Noah. But the tablet’s inscription describes a boat very different from the traditional image of the Ark—it’s said to be circular and made of reeds. Is this nothing more than a fanciful myth? Or could such a reed boat have carried Atra-Hasis’ family of more than one hundred and his many animals? Join NOVA as a team of historians and expert boat builders investigates this fascinating flood legend and sets out to rebuild a tantalizing, ancient forerunner of the Ark.

Maybe it won’t be awful.  Maybe.

A team attempts to build the flood boat using inscriptions from an ancient clay tablet. Airing October 7, 2015 at 9 pm on PBS

They’re Still Looking for Noah’s Ark…

Why??? Come on people, give. It. Up.

Is Noah’s Ark still hiding somewhere today, waiting to be discovered? A documentary coming to theaters nationwide next week explores the ongoing search for the world’s most famous vessel and documents the dangers involved in the centuries-old quest.

Save your money. Go buy a book or donate to poor relief or buy me a Starbucks giftcard (the latter will get you out of purgatory altogether for the right amount).

Eric Cline has Some ‘Serious’ ‘Competition’

Meet ‘Maverick‘- the flight nurse / ‘Biblical archaeologist’… who served as a consultant for an ‘archaeological’ expedition to find Noah’s ark…

Watch out Eric…. there are those waiting in the wings (with air nurse wings!) to dethrone you as the premier American digger.

UPDATE:  Oh boy….

Authors Aaron Judkins and Michael McDaniel talked about their new book, Alien Agenda, and how it relates to forbidden archaeology, UFOs, the Nephilim, and the coming of the Antichrist. Detailing the origins of his research, Judkins, an archaeologist, explained that he was intrigued by the preponderance of winged serpents and discs depicted by ancient cultures throughout the world. McDaniel, a theologian, traced his interest to meeting an alleged abductee and a subsequent investigation of the Bible where he found references to the UFO phenomenon. Both authors contended that UFOs are malevolent, with Judkins suggesting that the elusive nature of the phenomenon portends a sinister agenda and McDaniel connecting them to a long term plan hatched by Satan.

I think that pretty much says it all…

Another Noah’s Ark Under Construction: In Florida

Although given the source it might just be another Emergent quest for attention.

A group of animal lovers outside of Miami, Fla., is building a replica of Noah’s ark that will serve as what they say is a one-of-a-kind zoo. The “Hidden Ark”, which is about a fifth of the way complete, will be made almost entirely from wood and stretch more than 500 feet. The project’s creators said they hope that the zoo will also help to raise awareness about environmental issues. Unfortunately though, in case of a massive flood, the boat is not actually functional. One of the project’s creators, Carolina Peralta told NBC 6 Miami, “It’s a religious thing because it’s Noah, and God teaches us to protect animals. You’re using Noah’s Ark to make a statement about helping animals and conserving our planet.

*Bashing head into desk*.  So, it’s not functional and serves no useful purpose.  Wouldn’t the money spent constructing it have been better used in constructing, oh I don’t know, an actual animal shelter?   *Bashing head into desk*.  The folly acted out in the guise of some purported ‘biblical’ shadow…

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Did You Know That A Recent Discovery of Noah’s Ark Will Call into Question the ‘Theory of Revolution’???

It’s a fact!  And those ‘bible code’ crackpots think they’ve discovered the key to Noah’s Ark… Ha!

The book is about the discovery of what is believed to be Noah’s ark. A team of Turkish and Chinese explorers found a huge tree construction on top of mountain – Mt. Ararat in Turkey.

The book and its content will question the foundation of the theory of Revolution* and will raise confidence in the Bible as a historically reliable document, which once again has proven its credibility. It’s time for the truth to be revealed.

Author: Henri Nissen

It certainly is time for the truth to be revealed, so here it is: save your money, don’t buy this or any other idiotic book claiming to describe the discovery of Noah’s Ark.  Especially one aiming to debunk the theory of revolution…  [Eric Cline tipped me off].

______________

* sic!!!!!

Related articles

• Another Noah’s Ark Book… Heaven Forfend… (zwingliusredivivus.wordpress.com)
• Noah’s Ark Has Been Found… Yet Again… Again (zwingliusredivivus.wordpress.com)
• Another Hollywood Dilettante Quests for Noah’s Ark (zwingliusredivivus.wordpress.com)

Noah’s Ark Has Been Found… Yet Again… Again

And you just know that if the website announcing the find is called ‘Bible Code‘ it has to be the real deal…

God gave us all important data in the Biblecode, to find the Ark.  And he made clear, that we will be successfully.

If not grammatically… With thanks to Eric Cline for pointing out this gem- which includes several photos of the ‘discovery’…

Another Noah’s Ark Book… Heaven Forfend…

These things keep spewing from the presses like diarrhea spews from an ailing baby.  It’s no longer just simple silliness or sad dilettantism, it has become a cottage industry driven by greedy people concerned only for public acclaim and personal profit.

In May 2010 a Chinese-Kurdish research team released to the press that they had found a large wooden structure on Mt. Ararat at an altitude of 4,200 meters. But this spectacular discovery has been ignored – even though it IS most probably the biblical Ark of Noah.

No, it isn’t.

The Danish journalist Henri Nissen began in 1999 to research the topic and has made several expeditions to Eastern Turkey. His book, Noah’s Ark: Ancient Accounts and New Discoveries, has now been released. Nissen unveils the great Chinese-Kurdish discovery and presents the reader with facts that allow one to decide for himself if this find is genuine or not. He also presents a historical review of the search for the Ark and describes the ancient sources, both biblical and other, such as the Sumerian clay tablets, which also describe the Flood, the Ark, and persons alluding to Noah.

I know my Danish friends will be so very, very proud that this dilettante is one of their countrymen. But surely he must be a professional archaeologist or Biblical scholar, right?

Wrong.

Henri Nissen is a journalist and has written thousands of articles, produced radio broadcasts and television programs, and written 11 books. He has traveled extensively in French-speaking Africa for the Lutheran World Federation. He is now an independent media consultant. He is married to the artist Birthe Engedal and has a daughter and two sons.  The search for Noah’s Ark has been his passion for the last ten years, and he has visited the Ararat Mountains numerous times. This book is the result of his comprehensive research.

Journalists… Why they think they’re capable of serious scholarship is beyond me. Anyway, Mr Nissen, you’ve earned it, so here’s your dilly:

[Thanks to Eric Cline for pointing the story out.]

Another Hollywood Dilettante Quests for Noah’s Ark

Former Baywatch star Donna D’Errico got pretty banged up while on expedition to find Noah’s Ark in Turkey.  Yes, this is apparently a thing that people do.  The actor posted photos of herself with a bunch of nasty cuts and bruises from what was apparently a “major fall” while hiking Mount Ararat.  But D’Errico has two more days on her trip, and she is determined to stick it out. How can she return home when she’s so close to finding evidence of Noah’s Ark? (There is no evidence of Noah’s Ark.)  Also, she’s going back again next month.

It must just be the Hollywood thing to do.  Waste your money on a fool’s errand.  Eric Cline pointed the story out on Facebook.  So since it gave me an aneurysm I feel it necessary to send it along to you…

And since those Hollywood types love awards- Miss, here’s yours!

Noah’s Ark Has Been Found!!!!!

Oddly, though, it’s no where you would expect.  In fact, it’s a bit further north than anticipated.  It’s in Köln!

Breaking News!!!!! The Ark of the Covenant Has Been Found!!!!

It has been discovered!  Finally!!!!

Unfortunately circumstances make it impossible to excavate further.  We need more funding!  If I can raise $10,000,000 in the next week we can go ahead and finish the work and prove to the world that the 10 lost tribes came to America and deposited the Ark of the Covenant in, of all places, my front yard!

Please help!  Please send what you can to me via Paypal.  I promise, when I have the funding I need I’ll dig the thing up and you will have, as an investor, first dibs on parts of it!

[If the Noah’s Ark people can ‘find’ that thing and then say they can’t get to it to verify it, why can’t I and anyone else, huh?]

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Hate Yourself? Want an Aneurism? Not Had Enough of the False Claims of Discoveries of Noah’s Ark?

If you answered yes to all three of those questions, you might want to see this.

http://downloads.cbn.com/cbnnewsplayer/cbnplayer.swf?aid=27089

If you don’t hate yourself, don’t desire an aneurism, and have in fact had enough of the false claims of discoveries of Noah’s Ark, best to skip it.  And if you do go ahead and look, just consider the source- CBN…

Daniel McGivern and his team claimed to have discovered two large sections of Noah’s ark resting just below surface atop Mount Ararat in Turkey — where the Bible says the ark came to rest. “The mountain is treeless. The mountain is volcanic with gases. There is no conceivable way that you could have an object that big on a mountain,” McGivern said.

More Dilettantism Concerning Noah’s Ark

By someone called Joel Klenck (who, it so happens, is a Harvard grad… it must be Dilettantes from Harvard Day or something).  Anyway, dear Joel is lending his credible Harvard voice (!) to the pseudo-archaeologists of NAMI (not to be confused, I suppose, with NAMBLA) and suggesting that, yup, you guessed it, they’ve actually found Noah’s Ark on Ararat…  And the site on which his stunning claims are contained…oh boy.

But I’ve gotten ahead of myself.  First, the photo of the Ark (!)

See it?  It’s right there.  You can’t miss it unless you’re just one of those evil unbelievers…  But back to the site touting Klenck’s support of NAMI – here’s their left nav panel….

Look at that!  Let’s face it campers, if you can’t trust Klenck’s stuff on THAT page just what exactly can you trust.  I believe, I believe, I believe….  I must make holy pilgrimage to the site of Noah’s Ark so that I too can feel the blessing…

Anyway I don’t know about you, but I have a totally new respect for what Harvard produces.  And for Klenck.  I mean, the guy has one stuffed full resume just packed with miraculous accomplishments.

But to return to the Ark (because heaven knows we can never hear enough about it)

“The site is no hoax,” Klenck states, “and the size and excellent preservation of the edifice will enable it to be studied by numerous scholars.” He notes, “The large wood structure is buried under tons of stones and ice and most of the edifice remains unexplored.”

I’m convinced…  So in Honor of this Astonishing Find/Discovery I’d like to give J.K. my highest award:

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‘Noah’s Ark’ – The Facebook Game…

No, I’m not making that up…

Oliver Steffen – «Noah’s Ark» ist ein Strategie- und Aufbauspiel im Stil des berühmteren Farmville. Der Spieler hat die Übersicht über Noahs Haus, Stall und Feld. Auf Knopfdruck lässt er den Knecht pflügen, säen, ernten, Holz spalten, Tiere anlocken, domestizieren und füttern – Das Spiel erfordert diszipliniertes Haushalten mit Geld, Manna (Energie) und Nahrungsmittel – jede Arbeit kostet Mannapunkte, das Füttern der Tiere verbraucht Nahrungsmittel. Nutztiere bringen Geld, das wiederum in Saatgut, Vorratstöpfe und Dekorationen investiert wird.

Play on….

Noah’s Ark in New York

Dozens of flea-infested animals and several rotting animal corpses were removed from a filthy New York home where an elderly woman with dementia lived with two younger people, authorities said on Wednesday.  Living in the house were a calf, fancy hens, rats, rabbits, a chinchilla, a Mallard duck, a pheasant and other animals, said Sergeant Regina Benfante of the Suffolk County, New York, Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals.  “You name it, and that type of animal was in there,” she said. All told, 76 live animals and about 10 corpses were found, she said.

The smell… the smell… can you imagine the vile stench?  So gross and sad (for the elderly inhabitant).

Where the Bloggers Will be Spending Christmas Break… ‘The Ark Encounter’

Led in caravan there by James McGrath and Duane Smith (the tour guides) and accompanied by most of the other theo/biblio bloggers (except me- we Pastors don’t get ‘Winter Recess’ and all the other delightful ‘off days’ that the Ivory Dwellers get.  We have to work for a living).

The new theme park isn’t open yet, but word on the street is that McGrath and the others are going to act as ‘consultants’.  Fun times!  Doubtless their participation will ensure that the ‘theme park’ will be 100% historically accurate and 100% theologically acceptable.

The ‘park’ is big news in Northern Kentucky (where most of the residents are apparently inebriated from too much whiskey and depressed because of massive gambling debt) –

Plans for a new Northern Kentucky theme park were unveiled Wednesday morning in Frankfort, Ky.  Governor Steve Beshear joined Ark Encounter LLC and Answers in Genesis, the developers of the Creation Museum, with details of “Ark Encounter”. The theme park is expected to be built in Grant County near Veteran’s Cemetery in Williamstown, but multiple sites are being considered.  A full-scale wooden Noah’s Ark will be built in the park and include associated museums, theaters, amenities, event venues and outdoor parking. Preliminary indications are that the park could draw as many as 1.6 million guests per year and would cost $150 million to build, all privately funded.  The theme park will create approximately 900 new jobs. Ark Encounter is expected to take three years to build and open in the spring of 2014.

One word: ghastly.  Just ghastly.

Well Sure He Defends His ‘Expedition’, What Else Can he Do?

Admit it’s all a hoax?

Here’s a video of the leader of the Chinese Ark Hunters explaining the hunt and the reaction of the doubters…

It’s just so absurd. Note well that when the discovery was first announced, the team was 99.9% sure it had found Noah’s Ark. In the video, they’re 90% sure. And they’re already planting the seeds of their ‘well we weren’t completely sure really’ admission later on when it turns out to be recognized as a rubbish find.

The bottom line is, they’ll still continue to collect money and the gullible will still believe their ‘discoveries’ no matter how ridiculous.

Yeah Bob, That’s Styrofoam

Yup, it sure is.  Or something very much like it.

The Turkish Ministry of Culture Has Launched an Investigation of the ‘Ark Hunters’

Here’s the story.

Turkey’s Ministry of Culture and Tourism has launched an investigation into claims by a research team named Noah’s Ark Ministries International that they have found Noah’s Ark.

They’ll most likely find them guilty of fraud. Because it is fraud.

The Hong-Kong-based team claimed earlier this week that they have found the remains of Noah’s Ark on Mount Ağrı in eastern Turkey. The ministry has also initiated an investigation into state officials of the province of Ağrı, including Deputy Governor Murat Güven, Provincial Tourism Director Muhsin Bulut and an official from the district governor’s office in Doğubeyazıt, who were present at the press conference in Hong Kong where the explorers made their finding public.

And

“A statement was made from abroad, claiming that Noah’s Ark has been found. There were Turkish state officials present when the statement was made. We are investigating the technical and legal aspects of the issue. How did these objects get there [to Hong Kong] and under whose authority were the officials present there? We are investigating this,” Culture and Tourism Minister Ertuğrul Günay said.

Read the whole thing… on one hand they want to be careful but on the other they seem to want to leave the door open for further searches (since it doubtless makes them a bit of money from tourists and permit buyers).

With thanks to Eric Cline for telling me about it.

Noah’s Ark Found, Yet Again… For the Umpteenth Time…

Oh when will the dilettantism ever end?  Adelaide Now reports

CHINESE and Turkish evangelical explorers believe they may have found Noah’s Ark – 4000m up a mountain in Turkey. The team said it had recovered wooden specimens from a structure on Mount Ararat in eastern Turkey that carbon dating proved was 4800 years old, around the same time the ark is said to have been afloat. “It’s not 100 per cent that it is Noah’s Ark but we think it is 99.9 per cent that this is it,” said Yeung Wing-cheung, a Hong Kong documentary filmmaker and member of the 15-strong team from Noah’s Ark Ministries International. The structure had several compartments, some with wooden beams, which were believed to house animals, he said.

So China has its own Simcha Jacobovici does it?

The Sun is carrying the ‘story’ too. And it has a picture!!!!!!

It’s time to remind one and all to read Eric Cline’s book- From Eden to Exile: Unraveling Mysteries of the Bible (Washington, DC: National Geographic Books, 2007; paperback 2008). Seriously, hasn’t it been translated into Chinese and Turkish? Those folk clearly need to read it.

UPDATE:  Well Eric informs me that the ‘archaeologists’ website has loads of photos (at the bottom of this page).  Looks more like the inside of a modern run down barn to me.  And the whole thing has the feel of a money making scheme.

UPDATE II: Richard Bartholomew has a load of background information on the group claiming the find.