Category Archives: pseudo-christianity

Just Stop It

Stop distorting the Bible to make a buck.

Pentebabbleists Are Unhinged Nutbags

Erm….  You guys are an idiot sandwich.

Behold, the Emergent Theology of the Pseudo-Christian

John Hagee Is No Christian, He is A False Teacher and Heretic

What Rubbish

The male version of Nadia Bolz-Weber has outdone himself…

Rodney Howard-Browne: Pentebabbleist ‘Pastor’ With Murder on His Mind

On Monday, right-wing pastor and radical conspiracy theorist Rodney Howard-Browne guest-hosted “The Alex Jones Show” on InfoWars, during which he asserted that Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg should be shot for treason. Howard-Browne, who laid hands upon and prayed over President Trump in the Oval Office last year, was interviewing right-wing activist and commentator KrisAnne Hall, when he attacked Gingsburg for daring to suggest, back in 2012, that Egypt should “look at the Constitution of South Africa” when drafting a new constitution, rather than the U.S Constitution.

“If you hear Bader Ginsburg talk, she talks about the Constitution of America being totally flawed,” Howard-Browne complained. After Hall recounted Ginsburg’s 2012 statement, Howard-Browne asserted that Ginsburg should have been removed from office because “that was high treason.” “She should have been impeached, immediately,” Hall agreed. “I’d have them shot,” Howard-Brown replied. “To me, that’s a total violation, because how do you pledge to defend the Constitution when you are totally throwing it under the bus?”

Once again we have evidence, from their own mouths, that pentebabbleists are anything but Christian.

Lifeway: For When the Bible isn’t Enough

Lifeway has a new movie based ‘bible study’, for your small group.  Because studying the Bible itself is just so hard and without a ‘popular’ hook you just can’t get people interested in doing it…

‘Pastrix…’ That’s a New One

I guess when your theology stinks you have to find some way to refashion the faith to match your wishes…

I guess ‘Pastor’ is too penis-centric for Nadia.

Oh, and the Christian faith isn’t about God pulling us out of the graves we dig for ourselves.  It’s about redemption from sin and deliverance from its eternal consequences.  But don’t expect the pastrix to talk about sin.  That concept doesn’t exist in her universalist universe.

Pat Robertson is Not a Christian: Exhibit 4048

In another example demonstrating that Pat Robertson believes in persecuting non-Christians and indoctrinating children, the televangelist openly suggested that parents should beat their kids until they respect Christian beliefs.

During yet another shameful episode of the 700 Club, which runs on Disney-owned channel ABC Family, Robertson received an email from a woman who claimed that her grandson disrespects their Christian faith when they visit their daughter on Christmas and chose not to visit this past year.

“We declined going to our daughter’s house on Christmas this year because there is always an argument, hard feelings etc.,” viewer Karen wrote.

“One grandchild comes high on marijuana, cursing and challenging our faith. I correct him and have told my daughter to ask him to respect our beliefs, but he keeps it up. Our daughter says she is a Christian but will drink too much and offend her daughter and her husband. Were we wrong to not to attend another Christmas that leaves us upset or someone angry? I have shared my beliefs many times with them and am ridiculed by this grandson and son-in-law.”

Robertson’s immediate solution? Beat the child until he respects Christianity.

“Somebody take that kid to the woodshed and let him understand the blessings of discipline,” Robertson advised before predicting that the kid would end up in prison if a strong male figure didn’t start beating him right away.

“He needs a strong male figure. He’s going to wind up in a correctional institution, and the next thing you know, he’s going to be doing hard time in some prison. And then he would wish he wasn’t such a smart, you know, wise guy. Because he’ll be disciplined in a way that he’ll never forget in some prison… He needs discipline in the worst possible way.”

Robertson is not a Christian.  Nothing he says is Scriptural.  He is a deceiver, a liar, and a false teacher.  Those who support him support evil and his tv station is a tool of evil.

This is yet more evidence that Robertson is no Christian and pentebabbleists aren’t either.

More Pentebabbleist Nutbaggery: Hurricane Michael Was Caused By Democrats in Retaliation for Kavanaugh

You can’t make this nonsense up.

One of my greatest sources of unintentional comedy is Mark Taylor, otherwise known as the “Firefighter Prophet.” Among his bizarre prophecies and conspiracy theories is a recurring theme: that Democrats (and former President Obama) are using weather control technology to obstruct President Trump’s agenda.

Earlier this month, Taylor claimed Hurricane Florence was created by liberals to cover up mass voter fraud in North Carolina. In June, he said liberals were planning to create hurricanes to suppress the midterm election turn out. Now, he’s saying that Hurricane Michael, which is currently bearing down on Florida, was artificially created by “scared” anti-Trump forces in “retaliation” for Brett Kavanaugh’s confirmation to the Supreme Court.

“Does anyone else think it’s strange that Justice K is sworn in and we have a major hurricane inbound?” Taylor tweeted this Tuesday. “DS scared? They should be. Retaliation? Absolutely. We will not be intimidated! Warriors arise, time to go to work! You know what to do.”

Pentebabbleists shouldn’t be allowed within 500 miles of the Bible and 10,000 miles of theology.  They can’t understand Scripture and they don’t know what theology is.

Said No Reformed Theologian, Or Scripture, Ever

Some days it just doesn’t pay to look at twitter.

giphy

What Damnable Heresy

This is not how baptism works.

‘Streamline’ ‘church’ has streamlined baptism to a base farce and is no church.

This Is How The Prosperity Gospel Heretics Do It

‘winners chapel international’?  Good lord, why not just name it ‘prosperity gospel heretics international’.  At least that would be the truth.

And why does Texas have so many of these nutbag pentebabbleist prosperity lunatics?  Is it the heat?

Australian Pentebabbleists are Unhinged Too…

Pentecostal leaders have warned their congregation that “darkness” will spread across Australia and Christians will be persecuted if Scott Morrison does not win the next election.

Others have been told that Morrison’s rise to power was a “miracle of God” that answered three days of prayer and fasting. They have been told that Morrison has made a public stand for Christian freedoms, and has promised to keep doing so, so God intervened to ensure he beat the home affairs minister, Peter Dutton, in the Liberal leadership spill.

Videos posted to YouTube show how Pentecostal and evangelical religious communities are reacting to the rise of Morrison as prime minister.

Last Sunday, pastor Adam F Thompson from Voice of Fire Ministries and Adrian Beale from Everrest Ministries told a congregation of Hope City Church that Morrison’s elevation to power was divinely inspired.

Thompson, who says he can interpret dreams and that supernatural signs and manifestations accompany his ministry, said he’d received a message from God that Morrison and the Coalition must win the election.

“The Lord woke me up at 4.30am this morning,” Thompson told the Hope City Church congregation on Sunday, in a video he asked to be recorded.

“Scott Morrison, he’s a born-again Christian, he’s probably one of the first ever born-again prime ministers, but it’s not time to celebrate at the moment.

“This is a crucial time right now … In the next six months it’s time for the body of Christ [the Christian church] to put its differences aside … and come together and agree that Jesus is the Messiah and start praying together and calling it in and praying for our prime minister right now, and for our government.

Lunatics.  Unmoored, unhinged, unscriptural, unchristian lunatics.  The only thing worse than a Pentebabbleist is…. well, no, there is nothing.  The get it all wrong.  Every doctrine.  All of them.

Robert Jeffress Asks Congregation to Stand for the Reading of Donald Trump’s Tweets

As part of the church’s weekly patriotic service held Sunday, Pastor Robert Jeffress reportedly asked the congregation at First Baptist Dallas to stand for the traditional reading of Trump’s latest flurry of tweets.

“Let’s all take a moment and stand now in reverence as we listen to the infallible, inspired words of Trump,” Jeffress said solemnly. “If you have your smartphone with you, please turn with me to twitter.com/realDonaldTrump. We’ll be reading out of Trump’s September 5 tweets on down through the end of the week.”

Pastor Jeffress also indicated that if anyone didn’t have their smartphone with them, there was a hard-copy, leather-bound printout of Trump’s tweets available in the book rack in front of them.

“Thus saith the Lord,” he began, before reading Trump’s infamous “TREASON?” tweet and proceeding through everything else the President posted that week. Jeffress’ inflection rose and fell as he attempted to replicate the passion, emotion, and pure rage indicated in the original inspired texts penned by Trump throughout the week. The Dallas preacher also got choked up when he began reading a post in which the President criticized the New York Times. “Excuse me. Sorry—sometimes I just get a little misty-eyed when I browse through Don’s Twitter feed.”

“May Trump add his blessing to this reading and to our nation. Amen,” he concluded at last, wiping tears from his eyes from moving tweets like “Make your products in the United States instead of China. Start building new plants now. Exciting!” and “What was Nike thinking?”

This is actually a spot on portrayal of Jeffress’s heretical servitude to Trumpianity.  The sad thing is that the deluded people of First Baptist, Dallas keep going along with Jeffress.

John MacArthur’s ‘Social Justice’ Statement is Theologically and Biblically Deficient

MacArthur’s statement fails to take the Gospel in its fullness seriously.  It fails to understand the implications of the Gospel.  And it’s greatest theological failing is that it fails to show a willingness to make any use at all of Matthew 25:31ff.

In short, MacArthur and his co-signatories lack theological acumen and exegetical knowledge.  Accordingly, no theological statement from them or signed by them can be taken seriously as either a Christian statement of faith or a theological declaration that should be adopted by anyone.

It is heresy.

I Don’t Know Who this Bill Johnson Character is…

But theologically, he’s a moron.  So I’m sure he’s very popular with the massa perditionis and emergents.  But I repeat myself.

Calvin would toss him on the fire with Servetus.

The Cult of Trump

The Atlantic calls it the ‘Church’ of Trump, but it isn’t.  It’s a cult.

You could list the scandals—from Robert Mueller’s probe to Michael Cohen to Stormy Daniels, from Tom Price to Scott Pruitt to Ben Carson, from Bill Shineto Ronny Jackson to Jared Kushner, from the Trump Hotel to the Trump label, from Charlottesville to Ukraine—and while it would be very long, it would not (at least in the eyes of Trump’s supporters) be disqualifying. Politically speaking, the president is standing with his guns blazing in the middle of Fifth Avenue, and he’s not losing anyone. Miraculously, Trump remains on top; so far this year, Gallup has registered an approval rating among the members of his own party ranging from 81 to 90 percent. Despite it all, those numbers have barely budged.

How is such a thing possible? In part, it’s a symptom of contemporary politics—Barack Obama enjoyed similarly high approval ratings from Democratic partisans during his terms in office. And there’s some evidence that Republicans disaffected with Trump are ceasing to identify with their party, leaving only the president’s supporters behind. But Obama never endured a comparable string of scandals; the erosion of the GOP’s ranks doesn’t explain the fervency of those who remain.

Is it Trump—or something larger than Trump? Possibly, it’s both. Last spring, my colleague Peter Beinart looked at the increasing secularization of American society and how it had contributed to the rise of political tribalism:

As Americans have left organized religion, they haven’t stopped viewing politics as a struggle between “us” and “them.” Many have come to define usand them in even more primal and irreconcilable ways.

This tribalism has infected both the right and the left—but in particular, Beinart cited the work of W. Bradford Wilcox, a sociologist at the University of Virginia who has concluded that “rates of religious attendance have fallen more than twice as much among whites without a college degree as among those who graduated college.”

Non-college-educated whites are the Trump base, now set adrift:

Establishing causation is difficult, but we know that culturally conservative white Americans who are disengaged from church experience less economic success and more family breakdown than those who remain connected, and they grow more pessimistic and resentful.

You could draw a straight line from a disenfranchised, pessimistic, resentful audience to Trump’s brand of fear-driven, divisive politics, but this would leave out an equally important part of the Trump phenomenon, and something critical to its success: the elation. Go to a Trump rally, speak to Trump supporters, and the devotion is nearly evangelical. Their party line is less a talking point than a sermon: His voters have talked to me about the “bad deal” with Iran, the “drug mules” crossing the border, the Mueller “witch hunt.” The language is uniform, as they quote chapter and verse. Here are the true believers: It is no surprise that Trump’s numbers won’t move.

Etc.  It’s all really quite stunning.

Calling it A Church Doesn’t Make it a Church- And This Isn’t a Church

No sermons at this church: Congregants wander silent and barefoot through nature at Church of the Wild

Nope. Not a Church. Sorry not sorry. It bears none of the marks of the Church and simply falls short theologically of what εκκλησια means.

The sound of drumming filtered through the trees and called the people from their cars.

Toting folding chairs and slathered in bug spray, they came from the parking lot — some young, some old; some in pairs, some alone; many in Tevas, a few barefoot. Without speaking, they set their chairs in a circle in a leafy clearing in McLean’s Turkey Run Park. They grabbed drums laid out on a patterned blanket, gripped the instruments between their knees and joined in the pounding.

“Your hands know what to do,” intoned professional drum circle facilitator Katy Gaughan. “Just drum! There is no right way and no wrong way.”

On a hot and muggy Sunday, Church of the Wild was about to begin.

The church, which meets once a month in parks across the District, Maryland and Virginia, draws about 50 congregants. Services, presided over by the Rev. Sarah Anders, typically run an hour and a half. Worshipers drum, sing and listen to recitations of poetry in an effort to connect with nature and fulfill the church’s stated goal: honoring “the mutual indwelling of the Divine with the Earth and all of its beings.”

Not a church.  Not close to a church.  Nothing like a church.  Calling it a church makes the one who does so a liar, and not it a Church.

Tim Clinton: Christian ‘Counselor’ and Plagiarist

This guy…. wow.  His plagiarism makes Mark Driscoll’s look like amateur hour.  Wow.