That Awkward Moment When you Realize You’re Reading Pure Rubbish

This Is Why No One Can Take Pentebabbleism Seriously: Bert Farias Wins the Dilly This Week

Writes one pentebabbleist in something called ‘Charisma

[Homosexuality] is such a putrid smelling demon that other demons don’t even like to hang around it. A genuine prophet of God told me that the Lord allowed him to smell this demon spirit, and he got sick to his stomach. And yet as humans, many embrace this demon. Yes, you heard me right. Being gay is demonic.

There is an account in the Bible where Jesus casts out 2,000 demons out of a man. The demons came out screaming and begged Jesus to send them into the pigs. The pigs didn’t want them, so they ran down a steep hill and were drowned in the sea. Pigs have more sense than some humans. People embrace homosexual demons, but the pigs would rather die than be possessed with demons.

Erm…  Bert Farias isn’t a member of SBL.  I suspect he’s in AAR.  Anyway, he’s a lousy exegete. So, Mr F., here’s your Dilly, and might I add, it’s very well deserved:

dilly-the-dilettante

Cargill And Goodacre Say Some Pretty Bizarre Things… Supposedly

This is the funniest satirical (I hope) or idiotic (probably) ‘report’ on the Talpiot craziness I’ve yet seen.  It contains all manner of things that I sure hope no one I know actually said (and I’m confident they didn’t- unless they’ve lost their minds).  Here are some gems:

… some of the inscriptions, this sort of as the identify for Jesus, are challenging to go through, claimed Robert Cargill, a classics and spiritual research professor at the University of Iowa in Ames, who was not involved in the review.

Huh?

“You can find no evidence at all that Jesus experienced a son at all, allow on your own a son referred to as Judah,” Goodacre stated.

Is Goodacre channeling Joel Watts?

When Jacobovici argues that the identify corresponds to one particular of Jesus’ followers, Mary Magdalene, early Christians did not call Mary Magdalene “Mariamne” — relatively, she was just termed Mariam or Marya, Goodacre stated.  When individuals inconsistencies are also thought of, the statistical circumstance for the names matching people of Jesus’ family falls aside, Cargill claimed.

Did they now…

But Goodacre and Cargill claimed theological inquiries do not variable into their skepticism. Relatively, the authentic problem is that the scientific requirements have not been met, Cargill mentioned.

Bahahahaha….  This quality of research, writing, and explanation can only come from someone who wrote a first draft report for BAR.

But, I really do like that Cargill’s position in Iowa is specified.  I always wondered what he did up there…

The Nonsense That Will Not Die: Ossuaries in the News

The New York Times writes

… the earth may have yielded new secrets about these disputed antiquities. A Jerusalem-based geologist believes he has established a common bond between them that strengthens the case for their authenticity and importance…. 

 For the last seven years, Dr. Shimron has been studying the chemistry of samples from chalk crust scraped from the underside of the Talpiot ossuaries and, more recently, from the James ossuary. He has also studied samples of soil and rubble from inside the ossuaries. In addition, for comparative purposes he has examined samples from ossuaries from about 15 other tombs. Mr. Jacobovici, who has been documenting the research for another movie, said “the production” financed the lab work.

In the words of Frozen- let it go.  Let it go.  Funding the geology of the ossuary by Simcha is like funding the safety of tobacco safety research by Marlboro.

Now Price Suggests Paul Didn’t Exist Either

Robert Price is one of the few (very few) credentialed scholars who doesn’t think Jesus existed. His work (and work put forth by others in the same vein) has been debunked by scholars ranging from the evangelical variety to atheists. I’ve blogged about that before. (For those interested, there was a specific response book put out years ago to Price’s Jesus mythicism calledThe Jesus Legend: A Case for the Historical Reliability of the Synoptic Jesus Tradition).  Price has since moved on to arguing that Paul never existed. His views are set forth in his new book, The Amazing Colossal Apostle: The Search for the Historical Paul.

Nothing quite like nutbaggery mixed with the desire for public notoriety.   It makes for lousy scholarship but it makes for great television.

Price doesn’t really exist though.

John Hagee- Plagiarist Plagiarizing Dreadful Wrong Theology

Richard Bartholemew has the gory details.  Read the whole- it truly is a parade example of a blind pseudo theologian leading a blind Hagee to a ditch.  I especially liked this bit.

In a rare acknowledgement of the need for accuracy, WND points out that “there were no blood moons in 1948… The blood moons tetrad confirmed by NASA’s website took place in 1949.” I’ll add that while NASA’s website has statistical data on lunar eclipses, I’m willing to take a bet that there has never been any statement relating to “the history of Israel”.

An Analysis By a Non-Theologian of Rachel Held Evans’ Latest Book

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Refs know foul….

Oh HuffPo- Do You Know No Theologian?

Because I’m guessing that you don’t.  Because the fact is, NO ONE KNOWS the answer to such a question but God and he doesn’t tell us lowly mortals.  So if your article doesn’t consist of the very concise sentence ‘no one knows’ in answer to your question, you’re wrong.

sigh

Please stop publishing theological stuff aimed only at provoking ‘discussions’ of issues for which no discussion is meaningful.  Stick with infotainment and Ariana rants of praise for lord Obama.  That’s where your writers shine.  That and cat memes.  Stay with what you know.  Leave theology to the theologians.  Or you’ll need to rename your website ‘The Evans-ian Post…’

Twitter Theology That Makes Me Sigh

Have publishers now come to the place where they have to invent non-existent theological debates in order to peddle their latest tome?  Aren’t there already enough real and pressing theological issues to write about?

sigh

Has anyone, anywhere, at any time, ever heard someone say ‘I think the Gospel must be a factory that makes useful and uniform disciples from a supply of raw souls’?  Ever?  Anyone?  Anywhere?

And what’s a raw soul?  Sigh.

Why Is there So Much Talk About the Bible Lately in the Media?

News outlets and websites and tv channels are only talking about the Bible because it’s almost #Easter and they only  #WantToCashInOnChristianity.

Make no mistake: they have no interest at all if their interest is part-time except in making a quick buck off gullible Christianity.  They also have no interest in the facts.  In fact, the more sensational and idiotic the claim or portrayal, the better the networks, websites and news outlets like it.  Nonsense sells.  That’s the bottom line.

If you really want to put an end to all the misrepresentation and misprision, don’t shop anywhere that advertises on one of the aforementioned specials and write the news network, tv channel, or website that features them to express your disdain.

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