Nope, Not Even Close, But Thanks for Trying…

Corrected, this reads ‘The Book of Revelation is a reminder to a persecuted community that no power on earth or in heaven is greater than the power of the King of Kings and Lord of Lords, Jesus.  It levels a warning against the world’s opposition to His power and comforts His disciples with the assurance that ultimate victory is His and thus theirs’.

So kindly stop trying to hijack Scripture to fit your political agenda.  It means more when you let it speak than when you try to force it into your blinkered perspective.

Does He Even Own a Bible?

Has he ever read it?  Ever studied the Prophets of the Hebrew Bible?  Ever familiarized himself with the meaning of the Hebrew word underlying the English ‘prophet’?  Or does he just prefer to mash Buddhism into his ‘Christianity’?  And has he ever read the Gospels?  Or does he just abstract them until they become what he wishes them to be?

Why is an eisegete the best known Catholic in America?

Twitter Theology That Makes Me Sigh

I don’t know what ‘atop Babel’ is supposed to mean but I do know two things and they are historically irrefutable:

  • The Bible was written by elites.  It wasn’t written for people who couldn’t read and in the ancient world that was just about everybody.
  • The Bible was written for elites.  Those were the only people who had the time, resources, and interest to bother with texts.

So, it’s simply a fact that the notion that the Bible is ‘the people’s book’ or some such thing is plain silly.  The public today can’t even read it (because they have to read it in translation- a function of the elite).

If people want people to read the Bible that’s fine.  Just don’t pretend it is ‘God’s letter to you’ unless you are among the exceptional few who can both read it and have the tools to understand it.

Ugh. Just Stop With the Cutesy Yet Meaningless Bumper Sticker Theology

We aren’t little fish and we are never even metaphorically described as such in scripture.  We aren’t born in water because baptism doesn’t regenerate us.  If it did, you could dunk folk all the time against their will and they would be forced into the fold whether they wanted to be or not.  And we don’t ‘continue in water’.  Indeed, that phrase literally makes no sense at all.

Just stop with the cutesy yet meaningless bumper sticker theology garbage.  It only impresses the ignorant.  Indeed, only the ignorant would think it meaningful precisely because of their ignorance.

#ICYMI: NT Wright Ascends to Heaven From Bible Conference in Houston!

Witnesses say that just before he was seen to fly skyward without a rocket pack, he spread out his arms, and then up he went, shouting ‘buy my giant book which is very much like all my other less giant books or the wrath of God will descend onto your unrighteous heads… sinners…’

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Witness stories diverge at this point but many swear that as he disappeared out of sight through a giant hole in the ceiling created by the hurling of his new book through it that he was received either by Chuck Norris or Ryan Seacrest.

He promised to return.  Oh that we will all still be alive when he does…  Meanwhile, many will come in his name, proclaiming his gospel and urging souls to follow Tom’s teachings (also known as TT).  If you want to get to heaven, and spend eternity with Tom, you have to embrace TT.

Twitter Theology That Makes Me Sigh

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Erm… “That very hour the word was fulfilled concerning Nebuchadnezzar; he was driven from men and ate grass like oxen; his body was wet with the dew of heaven till his hair had grown like eagles’ feathers and his nails like birds’ claws.” (Dan. 4:33).

Wouldn’t it be nice if people knew Scripture?  Before they blathered about it?  So I wouldn’t have to be all

nicholas