Daily Archives: 29 May 2018

Last Call

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Jesse Duplantis and Satan Team Up

In a public appearance with the prosperity gospel televangelist Tuesday, Lucifer the Prince of Darkness committed to matching all donations dollar for dollar that disciples of Jesse Duplantis make for his new private luxury jet.

“I hereby vow to double every dollar you give to help my friend Jesse get his new $54 million Falcon 7X,” Satan said at the press conference, as a smiling Duplantis looked on. “Together, we can help him reach his fundraising goal and spread his demonic message of abundance and prosperity all across the globe.”

“Please, if you can find it in your heart, make a love offering today,” Satan added in a solemn plea.

Satan promised to wire the funds from his account in the underworld straight to Duplantis’s ministry as soon as he reaches half of his fundraising goal. The pair claim to have had a long working relationship, with Satan contributing his demonic power to the minister’s last three jet purchases and helping to provide a large portion of the televangelist’s underlying theology.

You know it’s true.

Roseanne Has Always Been Abhorrent

So it’s no surprise that she showed it in her vile tweets.

After Roseanne Barr posted a series of incendiary tweets, ABC canceled the reboot of her eponymous sitcom. “Roseanne’s Twitter statement is abhorrent, repugnant and inconsistent with our values, and we have decided to cancel her show,” ABC Entertainment President Channing Dungey said in a one-sentence statement Tuesday.

Haifa Dead Sea Scrolls Fonts

This is right cool-

For every reconstruction we produce, we create a computer font of the specific scroll in order to be as accurate as possible. Our fonts are free to download and on our website. Feel free to use them, share and spread them around. We ask to give the proper credit to our team. http://megillot.haifa.ac.il/index.php/en/cryptic-font

Bono Is a ‘Convenience Store Christian’

As long as he can dash in and dash out whenever he wants, he’s cool with Christianity.

In a heartfelt announcement Tuesday, U2 frontman Bono confirmed he would resume pretending to be a Christian after the official U2 account voiced support for the recent repeal of the Eighth Amendment in Ireland, which had prevented women from having abortions in the country.

The legendary musician had temporarily set aside his claimed Christianity during the campaign to repeal Ireland’s strict abortion restrictions, but confirmed he would be ending his hiatus from Christian values now that the measure has passed. The rock star reportedly feared losing U2’s large Christian fanbase and the adoration of worship leaders everywhere, but was able to assuage the concerns of these groups with his announcement.

“Now that the Eighth Amendment has been repealed, rest assured that I will continue to make vaguely Christian references in my interviews and music,” he said. “While I set aside my faith for a few weeks there to make sure that abortion would take over the once deeply religious nation of Ireland, I’m back and more passionate about Jesus and faith and love and stuff than ever.”

“Just, like, coexist, man,” he added.

Mockery well deserved.

Your Quarterly Reminder About the History of Palestine

Immer diese Zwinglis!

The Latest from the Zurich Blog

Here’s an interesting essay:

Die Reformierten sind stolz auf das „prophetische Wächteramt“. Sie verstehen sich als eine Kirche, die sich nicht in den Winkel frommer Innerlichkeit zurückzieht, sondern sich einmischt, politisch Stellung bezieht, sich auf die Seite der Schwachen und Entrechteten schlägt. Immer wieder hört man denn auch den Ruf, die Kirche müsste mutiger auftreten, deutlich Kante zeigen, ihre prophetische Funktion beherzter wahrnehmen. „Mehr Prophetie wagen“, riet der deutsche Journalist Matthias Drobinski den kriselnden Kirchen unlängst.

Ich bin ebenfalls stolz, wenn meine Kirche klar Stellung nimmt, besonders dann, wenn sie sich damit auch gegen Mehrheiten stellt. Trotzdem habe ich meine Mühe mit dem Begriff des prophetischen Wächteramts. Der Begriff kommt mir zu gross vor für das, was wir als Kirche tun, wenn wir uns in der öffentlichen Diskussion vernehmen lassen. Mehr noch: Der Begriff erscheint mir aus der Zeit gefallen. In einer schlechten Weise nicht mehr zeitgemäss. Warum?


A New Project

The Theological University of Kampen and the European Melanchthon-Academy in Bretten introduced a new international research project in the framework of RefoRC: Reformation, Musical History and Theology.

Read all the details here.

The Anniversary of the Theological Declaration of Barmen is A Couple of Days Off

Barmen Declaration (1934). The statement drawn up at the first Synod of the *Confessing Church at Barmen from 29 to 30 May 1934, to define the belief and mission of the Church in the face of the theologically liberal tendencies of the Nazi *German Christians. The foundation of the Church was held to be the Revelation of God in Jesus Christ and not any subordinate revelation in nature or history, and her primary mission was defined as to preach the Gospel of the free Grace of God. The Synod and its Declaration were deeply under the influence of K. Barth. Text, with full bibl., in K. D. Schmidt (ed.), Die Bekenntnisse und grundsätzlichen Äusserungen zur Kirchenfrage, 2 (1935), section 42, pp. 91–8. G. Niemöller, Die erste Bekenntnissynode der Deutschen evangelischen Kirche zu Barmen (Arbeiten zur Geschichte des Kirchenkampfes, 5–6; 1959). W.-D. Hauschild, G. Kretschmar and C. Nicolaisen (eds.), Die lutherischen Kirchen und die Bekenntnissynode von Barmen: Referate des Internationalen Symposiums auf der Reisenburg 1984 (Göttingen, 1984). K. Scholder, Die Kirchen und das Dritte Reich, 2 [1987], esp. pp. 159–219; Eng. tr., 2 (1988), pp. 122–71.

From the Oxford Dictionary of the Christian Church.  Spend some time pondering this exceedingly important theological statement.  The Church needs to stand even today against the temptation to be an agent of the State.   Indeed, especially those pastors who have become puppets of the political parties.

Oh Martin, Your Amusing Hubris…

„Das ist mein Glaube, denn also glauben alle rechten Christen“ – Martin Luther