The Bee Stings ‘Game of Thrones’ (You Knew They Would)

I can’t vouch for the accuracy of this lampooning as I’ve never seen as much as 10 seconds of the series. But some of you have seen every moment, and you’re happy enough to skip Sunday Evening worship to do it:

Skipping All Nude Scenes, Christian Makes It Through Six Seasons Of ‘Game Of Thrones’ In 20 Minutes

After years of abstaining from the wildly popular Game of Thrones due to its graphic nature, local man Kyle Schneider decided Thursday that he would allow himself to watch the hit show on one condition: he would skip past any scenes containing nudity or sex. After making the pact with himself, Schneider caught up with the show by binge-watching the first six seasons, and true to his word, skipped all nude scenes, making it through all 60 episodes in just under 20 minutes.

“What a wild show,” the man told reporters after his viewing session. “Both minutes of season one that contained no nudity or sex were pretty crazy! So many plot twists.”

“I’m happy I ended up getting 20 total minutes of viewing time through the first six seasons. At first I thought it would be a lot less than that—hoo boy,” he added.

At publishing time, Schneider had decided that he would also fast-forward past all graphic violence in the series moving forward, effectively leaving himself with just the opening sequence and closing credits.