Internet users looking at Jacob Livingstone’s Twitter profile—which features a professional photo of him laid over a background gradient, along with a cover photo depicting a large city at night—might be led to believe the man is an important figure in modern culture, but recent research seems to suggest his bold claims about himself are at least partial fabrications.
His profile reads, “Thought Leader. Philanthropist. Theologian. Fierce Culture Warrior. Brand Manager. Sojourner.”—titles which are allegedly inaccurate to describe the 34-year-old sales associate’s rather average existence.
Reporters caught up with Livingstone Wednesday to grill him on the alleged discrepancy between his lofty titles for himself and his actual, ordinary life. “I may have gone a little overboard, sure. Lots of people do it,” he said.
When pressed, Livingstone reportedly admitted that by “thought leader” and “fierce culture warrior” referred to his wordpress.com blog, Livingstone Livingstrong, where he opines on various subjects roughly once every other month.
Similarly, Livingstone begrudgingly confessed that his important-sounding “brand manager” title was in fact a reference to his blog as well, which reportedly features a tab describing the fact that he is available for speaking engagements, despite never having given a speech in his life.
At publishing time, Livingstone was adding “Speaker” to his Twitter bio.
LOL. It’s funny because it’s so true. Right Rachel Held Evans? “Doubt-filled believer, author of Searching for Sunday, A Year of Biblical Womanhood, Faith Unraveled.”
A recent study performed by LifeWay Research confirmed Wednesday that one’s level of closeness to the almighty God was directly proportional to how often they loudly proclaim what they gave up for Lent this year.
The study surveyed thousands of Christians who take part in the Lent season, and compared their frequency of telling others on Facebook or in person about what they had sacrificed with the quality of their relationship to God.
“Subjects who post daily about how much they’re missing whatever it is they gave up for Lent were found to be much holier and further along in their walk with Christ,” a research associate said, adding that the results were consistent across the board, no matter how small or trivial the sacrifice was.
“People who didn’t participate in Lent at all, or did so without telling anyone about it, were found to have almost no relationship with God whatsoever in most cases.”
Legion…. their name is Legion.
Sources from St. Peter’s Episcopal Church confirmed Wednesday that progressive Reverend Laura Frier rubbed ashes in the form of a question mark on every parishioner’s forehead, in lieu of the traditional sign of the cross.
“We just really don’t know, you know?” the Reverend said. “We knew we couldn’t go with a cross—far too offensive, really. We felt the question mark was much more open and inclusive than putting the horrifying symbol of a Roman execution device on everyone.”
“That’s what the gospel’s all about, I think? I just don’t really know,” she added.
As parishioners lined up to receive the traditional mark of ashes at the front of the church, Frier solemnly marked them with the sacred question mark symbol while speaking the words of blessing, “Question everything,” over each person.
At publishing time, reports indicated that other progressive ministers had spelled words like “RESIST” and “REALLY?” using the blessed ashes from the Western Christian tradition.
Yup. Pretty much.
People of your sort are hirelings, dumb dogs unable to bark, who see the wolf coming and flee or, rather, join up with the wolf. — Martin Luther
A Conference at the John a Lasco library. All the details are here.
“Be not angry that you cannot make others as you wish them to be, since you cannot make yourself as you wish to be.” — Thomas a Kempis
1525 Zurich Bible
On 1 March 1529 Zwingli’s edition of the Prophets was published; the Vorrede zur Prophetenbibel.
Dann obglych vormaals ein vertolmetschung der propheten ußgangen, ward doch dieselbe vonn vilen einvaltigen unnd guothertzigen(als von den widertoeufferen ußgangen) nit wenig geschücht, wiewol dieselbe, so vil wir darinn geläsen, an vil orten flyssig unnd getrüwlich naach dem ebreischen buochstaben vertütscht ist. Wäm wolt aber nit schühen und grusen ab der vertolmetschung, die von denen ußgangen ist, die die rechten rädlyfuerer warend der säckten unnd rotten, die unns uff den hüttigen tag in der kilchen gottes mee unruow gestattet, dann das bapstuomb ye gethon hatt? Under wölicher säckt etlich Christum Jhesum waaren gott sin gethörend verneynen, etlich den tüfel unnd die gottlosen sälig sprechen, dargegen die, die nun ein wenig lachtend, der verdamnuß zuoeignen. Die leerend einer oberkeyt nitt gehorsam sin unnd die werck dermaaß wider ynfuerend, daß man ann irer leer spüret, daß Christus by inenn nitt vil giltet, die die gröste glychßnery wider ufrichtend unnd in falschem schyn der frommkeyt inen selbs für alle gfallend. Wär wolt jaa sölichen getrüwen, daß sy die ort in den propheten, die vonn Christo, dem behalter der welt [cf. Kol. 1.17], waarem menschen unnd gott, lutend unnd gewyssaget sind, getrüwlich handletend, so Christus vonn inenn gott sin unnd für aller menschen sünd gnuoggethon unnd bezalt haben, verneynt wirdt?
Zwingli’s translation of the Prophets would be followed in 1531 with the publication of the entire Bible in Swiss German. As a translation, Zwingli’s is better than Luther’s- especially in the Old Testament where Luther’s lack of skill in rendering Hebrew is most apparent.
The Zurich Bible has been revised several times and is available for all who wish to read it. Which you should.