The Bee Stings the Milchtoasty Reverend

Many Christian leaders pridefully refuse to publicly repent, so it’s always refreshing to hear of a pastor who is willing to admit when he is in the wrong. Such is the case with local pastor Ralph Atkinson, who issued a public statement Monday morning openly repenting of mentioning the biblical concept of repentance in his weekly messages and Bible studies.

According to Atkinson, he began to feel convicted of talking about repentance too much during his Tuesday night Bible study, as he suddenly realized that calling his people to repent of their sins just felt “super awkward.”

“It suddenly dawned on me: I needed to repent of talking about repentance so often,” a spiritually broken Atkinson told reporters, his head in his hands. “I am turning away from my old way of doing things and casting myself on God’s mercy, praying that that He will help me stop making people really uncomfortable by talking about repentance.”

Atkinson further stated he plans on “lightening up” when it comes to talking about sin, hell, death, and the Lordship of Christ.

“I only pray God will forgive me for being so faithful in past years,” he said, before adding, “God’s a God of new beginnings, and I know He’ll give me a fresh, repentance-free start.”

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