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The Bee Stings the Silly ‘Evangelicals’ Who Get Their Info From CW And Not Scripture

26 Dec

A recent survey of self-identified American evangelicals found that the vast majority possess a view of angels, demons, spiritual warfare heavily informed by the popular CW television show Supernatural, a report released by The Barna Group Wednesday confirmed.

The influence of the show on the nation’s believers, laymen, and clergy alike, has been massive and far-reaching. According to the survey results, a full 80% of evangelical pastors recommend warding off demonic attacks using methods like shotguns filled with rock salt, complex devil traps carved into floors and ceilings, and “special,” demon-killing knives.

Further, an overwhelming 92% of Christians believe the best remedy for the darkness that is overtaking America is sending demon hunters like Sam and Dean Winchester to battle monsters, ghosts, witches, and demons all over the nation.

“The Bible tells us that Satan is going about like a roaring lion,” one anonymous respondent wrote. “How do you take down a lion? Magic bullets fired from a specially enchanted 1836 Colt Paterson revolver—that’s how.”

It’s funny because it’s probably true.

 
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Posted by on 26/12/2016 in mockery

 

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