Daily Archives: 26 Dec 2016

The Bee Stings the Silly ‘Evangelicals’ Who Get Their Info From CW And Not Scripture

A recent survey of self-identified American evangelicals found that the vast majority possess a view of angels, demons, spiritual warfare heavily informed by the popular CW television show Supernatural, a report released by The Barna Group Wednesday confirmed.

The influence of the show on the nation’s believers, laymen, and clergy alike, has been massive and far-reaching. According to the survey results, a full 80% of evangelical pastors recommend warding off demonic attacks using methods like shotguns filled with rock salt, complex devil traps carved into floors and ceilings, and “special,” demon-killing knives.

Further, an overwhelming 92% of Christians believe the best remedy for the darkness that is overtaking America is sending demon hunters like Sam and Dean Winchester to battle monsters, ghosts, witches, and demons all over the nation.

“The Bible tells us that Satan is going about like a roaring lion,” one anonymous respondent wrote. “How do you take down a lion? Magic bullets fired from a specially enchanted 1836 Colt Paterson revolver—that’s how.”

It’s funny because it’s probably true.

Ok Fine, Yet Another Quote of the Day

160307_EVA_Biographie_Luther_Cover_rz.inddFrom the author of this remarkable work-

Nicht das Selbst des Menschen musste befreit werden, sondern der Mensch musste von seinem Selbst befreit werden. Menschsein an sich bedeutete Unfreiheit, da sein Ich sich einen Platz außerhalb Gottes zu schaffen suchte. Nur Gott aber war frei.

The man understands Luther like few have.

Ok, Another Quote of the Day

160307_EVA_Biographie_Luther_Cover_rz.inddDer Glaube ist die Erneuerung der ganzen Natur, so dass Augen, Ohren und Herzen sehen, hören und fühlen, was alle anderen Menschen nicht spüren. –  Martin Luther

Quote of the Day

vermigli“We do not deny that we have fully merited your wrath; we beg and beseech you that you take it from us so that we may be stirred to the worthy praise of your name not only by words but by every instrument which is suited to lifting up our hearts to you. Through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.” – Peter Martyr Vermigli

Ritalin Now Approved to Treat Hypercalvinism

The U.S. Food and Drug Administration has approved Ritalin for the treatment of chronic Hyper-Calvinism in adults and teenagers, a Friday press announcement confirmed.

In clinical trials, the drug was shown to have a calming effect on patients, while simultaneously encouraging evangelism and stifling the belief that God will arbitrarily save people without ordaining any means of their salvation. According to the release, Ritalin was effective in 81% of test cases; when combined with regular Bible study—“regular” defined as “at least 4 times per week”—that number jumped to an amazing 99%.

Side effects were common but harmless and included “odd internal feelings” most often described as “love,” “passion,” and “a desire to reach non-Christians with the good news of Jesus Christ,” according to the study.

“The medication provides an additional choice for Hyper-Calvinists who are currently convinced they have no choice at all, about anything,” said an FDA spokesperson. “When combined with regular Bible study, this treatment plan has shown great promise, consistently relieving problematic overemphasis on God’s wrath while allowing patients to block out much of the peripheral noise that normally distracts them from grasping a biblical understanding of God’s love and the church’s role in the world.”


This is How Stupid the Huffington Post Is


If you get your religion news from the HuffPo, you’re as bad, if not worse, than the people who get their political news exclusively from Fox News.

If You Trust Wikileaks, You’re Kind of Foolish



Messed Up

Joseph Fitzmyer dies, relative silence.

George Michael dies, international lamentation.

This world is a pit.