Even though far more Catholics shopped online than in churches on Black Friday weekend, they are apparently not done yet.
A new EOTT survey released Sunday estimates that some 67-million Roman Catholics will shop online for their remission of temporal punishment in purgatory due for sins after absolution on Cyber Monday. That’s up only slightly from last year’s 65-million shoppers.
With Walmart and Amazon recently entering the Cyber Monday indulgence “game,” the Church is now offering heavy discounts as well, not only online but, more crucially, in churches. That move, which reflects how penitents shopped for forgiveness in 2016, is also meant to lower the stress of the Vatican website, which last year buckled under the intense eSpiritual-commerce pressure that naturally comes with Cyber Monday.
The evidence of the migration of “church shopping” to eSpiritual-commerce is incontrovertible: Eternal Fortune Magazine told EOTT on Sunday that eSpiritual-commerce sales between Thanksgiving and Saturday rose 13.7% to top $6.1 billion in new indulgences.
“The brick-and-mortar churches have made a big leap with their online efforts this year,” USCCB analyst Devin Thomas told EOTT yesterday. “They’re starting to get it. The USCCB says 63% of Black Friday indulgences placed on their website came from mobile devices…something we believe shows Catholics are growing more comfortable with pushing the “forgive me” button on smartphones.
Glory! He really is a Pope for all the uncommitted (and those planning to stay that way!)
Pretending that the Constitution is infallible and the Founding Fathers inerrant is the most idolatrous thing Americans do.
Woe to her who is rebellious and polluted, To the oppressing city! She has not obeyed His voice, She has not received correction; She has not trusted in the LORD, She has not drawn near to her God. Her princes in her midst are roaring lions; Her judges are evening wolves That leave not a bone till morning. Her prophets are insolent, treacherous people; Her priests have polluted the sanctuary, They have done violence to the law. The LORD is righteous in her midst, He will do no unrighteousness. Every morning He brings His justice to light; He never fails, But the unjust knows no shame. – (Zeph. 3:1-5)
Let those who have ears, hear.
Zwingli and Bullinger have a recommendation for you:
We love this book. Love it. LOVE IT. Never in the history of Christianity has a book so profound been made available to the masses for a price so reasonable. Reading it is a theological education in a single volume which contains everything necessary for both salvation and proper doctrine.
Were we more excited about it we would resemble tiny puppies laying on their backs getting their bellies rubbed and wetting themselves. That’s how excited we are about this book. – H.B., H.Z.
Wow. I’m super humbled and super honored. First a video recommendation a few months back and now this (again). I just don’t know what to say.
The book is available from the publisher via print on demand, here. Or you can get a PDF directly from the author for $10 here.
Krampus is coming for the bad children!