#Holla #Bam #TakeThatYouWretchWatts
#Holla #Bam #TakeThatYouWretchWatts
The Commentary is on sale for Memorial Day (because everyone has Memorial Day sales, don’t they) for a lowly $149. That’s right- get the only complete commentary on the Bible written by a single person in the last 100 years or more for a very reasonable price and feed your soul and your mind.
Sale ends midnight on May 31.
Noting that she encourages her 13-year-old daughter to listen to her music and watch her videos, local woman Rene Stout claimed Monday that Beyoncé is a good role model, in a statement she almost certainly made while confusing Beyoncé with some other recording artist.
“Whenever she comes out with a new album I buy two copies: one for me and one for my daughter Emily. Beyoncé is a great female leader who empowers women,” the apparently confused mother told reporters, adding that it feels good to know of at least one popular singer she can feel good about encouraging her daughter to listen to—a sentiment she undoubtedly reserves for some other pop culture personality but is mistakenly attributing to Beyoncé.
“Queen Bey’s art teaches my girl how to be a real woman in the 21st Century,” said Stout, who did not appear discombobulated or dizzy, but who, it can nevertheless be said, has probably mixed up Beyoncé and another well known celebrity. She then went on to explain that she has read numerous articles online which have informed her opinion on her favorite singer’s positive effect on females, especially impressionable tweens and teens who need strong heroines to emulate.
Asked if she may be confusing Beyoncé with another artist, Stout said no, explaining that she has followed the singer’s entire career since the days when she was the lead singer of Destiny’s Child, through her breakout solo album Dangerously In Love, to her marriage to rapper Jay Z. “Beyoncé—the one who just performed ‘Formation’ during the Super Bowl 50 Halftime Show—she’s a positive, empowering role model for women,” added Stout, continuing to presumably confuse the singer with some other cultural icon.
Burn! There are few things more absurd than Christians thinking pop stars should serve as role models.
To get your Carnival submissions in. So waste not a moment.
No one has done more to trivialize Jesus than Rob Bell and his mentors Oprah ‘I Believe In New Age Religion’ Winfrey and Joel ‘Just Smile, Everyone is Going to Heaven’ Osteen. How ironic of him, then, to talk about the trivialization of Jesus.
He deserves an award for most ironic statement of the decade.
During her trial for heresy (she really was a lunatic more than a heretic)…
Authorities were troubled that she claimed for her pronouncements the authority of divine revelation, prophesied the future, endorsed her letters with the names of Jesus and Mary (thereby identifying herself with a novel and suspect cult called the Name of Jesus), professed to be assured of salvation, and wore men’s clothing. She was finally convicted of being a schismatic (she said she felt accountable first to God and her saints rather than the church). When her sentence was read—execution by the secular authorities—Joan quailed and declared she would do all that the church required of her. Her sentence was changed to life imprisonment.
Three days later, however, she was found wearing men’s clothes again, and when asked about it, she said the voices of Catherine and Margaret had censured her for her “treason.” She was handed over to secular authorities.
At 9 a.m. on May 30, 1431, 19-year-old Joan walked toward the market square. She knelt and prayed for her enemies, then mounted the prepared pyre. As the flames leapt upward, Joan asked for a cross to be held before her. Gazing upon it, her final word was “Jesus.” – Olsen
Here’s a fine film based on the nutjob’s life: