Zwinglius Redivivus

ἐμοὶ δὲ εἰς ἐλάχιστόν ἐστιν, ἵνα ὑφ᾽ ὑμῶν ἀνακριθῶ

Archive for May 20th, 2016

It Happens All The Time

It’s obvious given the fact that so many who don’t know, or care to know, anything about the Bible are still in the Ministry

After attending a particularly powerful missionary presentation at his church last week, Mark Gerber, 21, reportedly felt an undeniable burning in his bosom—which he took to be a sign of God’s unmistakable calling for him to become a pastor. Unbeknownst to Gerber, however, the deluxe enchiladas he had consumed at lunch contained a large amount of tainted shredded beef, which was the actual source of the deep and powerful feeling within his bowels.

“I just know I’m called to ministry. It’s the craziest thing, like something new and special was placed inside me, something that definitely wasn’t there before lunchtime,” Gerber was overheard excitedly telling a group of friends engaged in small talk after the event. “I’m just so thankful God revealed His will to me in such a clear, precise way.”

Written by Jim

20 May 2016 at 3:53 pm


“Symbolic of his struggle against reality…” Such are the days of our lives…

Written by Jim

20 May 2016 at 1:55 pm

Posted in Modern Culture

Total Depravity: The Knoxville ‘Youth Minister’ Who Was Arrested for Sex Trafficking

After a three day investigation, agents with the Tennessee Bureau of Investigation and detectives with the Knoxville Police Department arrested 32 men and women on prostitution and human trafficking-related charges.

TBI said two of the men arrested, including Grace Baptist children’s minister Jason Kennedy, responded to ads for what they thought were girls under the age of 18. Investigators say those arrested come from every sector. “All of these people are somebody’s neighbor,” said TBI Director Mark Gwyn.

Perversity knows no economic, racial, social, or sexual boundaries. Women were arrested right along with men.

During the investigation, more than 300 contacts were made to ads placed on the website, according to TBI. They said one of their agents posed as a juvenile girl and the ad received more than two dozen contacts. “Human trafficking is a scourge on society,” said Knoxville Police Chief David Rausch. “We will continue to commit all the necessary resources and work alongside our law enforcement partners to help protect our most precious resource our children.”

Child molesters is the proper term for these people.  And no, they aren’t ‘innocent until proven guilty’.  They responded to ads for sex.  They’re already guilty.

Written by Jim

20 May 2016 at 12:53 pm

On Friends: An Observation

I have immense respect for my friends who hold diametrically opposed views on social issues and yet remain friendly and absolutely no respect for ‘friends’ who require absolute agreement.

Written by Jim

20 May 2016 at 11:23 am

Posted in Modern Culture

The Bee Stings The Vatican’s ‘Consumer Friendly’ Marketing

In another example of its recently-adopted “customer centric” business model, the Vatican announced Friday that it would begin taking competitor baptisms effective immediately—a move that is sure to cement the global chain’s dominant market position.

“Sprinkle, dunk, splash, Presbyterian to Methodist to Baptist—even Mormon,“ said Papal Spokesman Fr. Federico Lombardi at the press conference. “This is just another way for us to deliver convenience our customers.”

Fr. Lombardi says the Roman Catholic church, hoping to making the switch easier for those currently in contract with a Protestant denomination or another church or sect, will honor any baptism through its online “CatholicismSaves” customer discount program. Additionally, submitting any competitor baptism will be worth an automatic entry into the Vatican’s upcoming “Come Home Sweepstakes,” where one lucky winner will win a Treasury of Merit shopping spree, plus an exclusive offer of absolution.

#BAM.  Or should I say, bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

Written by Jim

20 May 2016 at 10:53 am

Posted in mockery, Modern Culture

Origen Was An Unhinged Lunatic

As Jerome remarks to a friend,

It is impossible that you should hold the opinion of Origen, Priscillian, and other heretics that it is for deeds done in a former life that souls are confined in earthly and mortal bodies.

You have to be a loon to think that deeds in a previous life (as though there were such a thing) is what ‘dooms’ people to human-ness.  Origen was a real unhinged madman who knew virtually nothing of authentic, orthodox, Christian faith.

How does he have admirers?

Written by Jim

20 May 2016 at 9:14 am

Posted in Theology

A New Film About Katie Luther

katie_lutherAuf dem Gelände von Schloss Reinhardsbrunn im Landkreis Gotha wird seit Donnerstag ein historischer Fernsehfilm zum Reformationsjubiläum gedreht. Das Werk thematisiert das Leben von Katharina von Bora, der Ehefrau Martin Luthers.


Written by Jim

20 May 2016 at 7:25 am

Where in the World is Chris Tilling Now?

Eating.  Pizza.  Free.  Because he stole it.  Because he thinks he’s God.

In an unusual retail theft report, police said a man stole a box of pizza because “his name was God and everything was his.” It happened Tuesday morning at a Weis Market in Shippensburg, Pennsylvania. Police say Chris Tilling Adam Farrell of Scranton refused to give his name when a store employee approached him and asked if he planned on paying for the pizza.  Tilling Farrell continued eating and told the store employee he was God. When approached by police, Tilling Farrell said he was “God and the police was the Devil.” Police took Tilling Farrel into custody and identified his real name through a fingerprint check.

He’s snapped.  All that time he spends hanging out with Tom Wright has finally rotted through to the core of his brain.  Bless him.

Written by Jim

20 May 2016 at 7:12 am

It’s Mecklenburg Declaration Day

The claim is that The “Mecklenburg Declaration,” was proclaimed by the Scotch-Irish Presbyterians of North Carolina, May 20, 1775.  Unfortunately, it’s bogus.

The Mecklenburg Declaration of Independence is the name given to a document that was allegedly produced on 20 May 1775, when the residents of Mecklenburg County declared themselves “free and independent people.” The so-called declaration did not surface until 1819, 44 years after the event, when it was published in the Raleigh Register at the behest of U.S. senator Nathaniel Macon. The original document was supposedly destroyed in a fire in 1800, and the published text was reconstructed from memory by John McKnitt Alexander and given to Macon by his son, William Alexander. William Polk, the son of the organizer of the Charlotte meeting, gathered testimony from several elderly men who claimed to have been present. Mecklenburgers immediately started celebrating the date.

The authenticity of the document was not seriously questioned until the posthumous publication of the works of Thomas Jefferson in 1829. In a letter of 9 July 1819 to John Adams, Jefferson dismissed the Mecklenburg Declaration as a hoax. The North Carolina legislature in 1830-31 was so aroused by this development that it established a committee to investigate. As committee chairman Thomas G. Polk organized the fiftieth anniversary celebration of the Mecklenburg Declaration, it is not surprising that his committee gathered evidence to support the contention that the declaration was authentic.

Despite North Carolina’s efforts, a number of scholars outside the state maintained that the Mecklenburg document was a fraud. The ultimate scholarly blow came in 1907 with the publication of William Henry Hoyt’s The Mecklenburg Declaration of Independence: A Study of Evidence Showing That the Alleged Declaration of Mecklenburg County, North Carolina, on May 20th, 1775, Is Spurious.

Journalists then, as (by and large) now, are terrible historians.

Written by Jim

20 May 2016 at 7:01 am

Posted in Modern Culture