Additional Facebook Statuses that they Clearly Need to Add

Gays are applauding the addition of ‘domestic partnership’ to the list of ‘relationship status‘ options users can select.

But I say, Facebook, if you’re in for a penny, be in for a pound.  If you really want to cover all the bases then you should add the following ‘in a relationship with:’ categories –

– with my dog.
– with my pillow.
– having a baby with my highschool boyfriend and we’re both 15.
– having a baby with my baby daddy and he’s 30 and I’m 12.
– having a baby but I’m so promiscuous that I don’t know who my baby daddy is.
– with my cat.
– with a chicken.
– with a horse.
– with a pair of horses.
– with two men and a dog, a cat, a woman, several fish, a buffalo, and a chicken wing from Dominos.
– with my 10 year old neighbor girl.
– with my 9 year old neighbor boy.

Because, let’s face it, if you’re going to list everything, you have to list every deviation so the deviants all have their deviation trumpeted.  If you’re going to tolerate one abnormalcy, you have to, by rights and in the name of equity, tolerate them all.